Game Recaps

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Sep 08, 2025

Studs, Duds, and Floods: Week 2 Recap

“All I wanted to do was kick the ball as hard as I could at the Kansas football players”

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Sep 04, 2025

Week 1 Recap, Week 2 Preview, and Obviously, Belichick

NC State tried their hardest to lose to ECU but mercifully prevailed, while Virginia took Coastal Carolina to the slaughterhouse like a Tyson’s chicken plant.

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Aug 25, 2025

Week 0 Recap & ACC Preview Part II

Some people want to see the pyramids, others want to see the Acropolis; I want to see a punting masterclass from Kirk Ferentz before I die.

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Nov 04, 2024

A Needed Distraction: Week 10 Recap

We've come to the unfortunate realization that the Selzer Poll is not a ranking of the best Whiteclaw flavors

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Oct 28, 2024

The Set-Up Episode: Week 9 Recap

...but it is noteworthy that Jimbo Fisher is, in fact, a fast-babbling buffoon.

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Oct 21, 2024

Something in the Orange: Week 8 Recap

Imagine being the defending national champion and you’re getting waxed by a team wearing airbrushed leather helmets

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Oct 14, 2024

Buyers Remorse: Week 7 Recap

Northwestern is like fighting a masochistic crackhead who wants you to punch them in the mouth so they can punch you right back.

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Oct 07, 2024

Anarchy Reigns: Week 6 Recap

Tennessee runs a gimmick offense that goes into a shell whenever it’s not humming on all cylinders. This was a big upset to be sure, but let it be known - Tennessee is a joke.

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Sep 30, 2024

Gut Punch: Week 5 Recap

Mario Cristobal got out Mario Cristobal-ed by Virginia Tech coach Brent Pry who showed his late-game clock management incompetence and still almost won.

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Sep 23, 2024

Tar Hell State: Week 4 Recap

The state of North Carolina football teams in a word: Mark Robinson?

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Sep 16, 2024

The Sun-whine State: Week 3 Recap

Their defense will keep them in almost every game but watching their offense might have to be codified in the Patriot Act as a new form of punishment for those at Guantanamo Bay.

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Sep 09, 2024

Life Comes at You Fast: Week 2 Recap

For Notre Dame, this was an inexcusable loss in every single way, and we are firm in our belief that this loss will get Marcus Freeman fired.

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